and i know it's been a while

so there's some to update everyone with.

school is over for the semester. no more 'year of turkey learning community.' and it's on to make friends in separate classes. i can't decide if i'm going to let my fears win over my desire to make new friends.

i figured out i can go to UGA in fall of '09 instead of waiting until spring '10, which is really exciting. i plan on moving in with the people i met in UGA, but i'm terrified my best friend will hate me for it. i don't know what to do, except for move on with my plans.

i lost my iPod. which is not what happened at all. but i'm scared to tell my parents.

i like a new boy. a very, very handsome boy. of course, this boy probably has no clue and never will because i'm too scared to tell him. of course he goes to Tech, which would only make sense since i'm leaving to go to UGA in a semester's time.

what i really want to know though, is how i promised myself that i would make a change and it's still hasn't come about. i'm still too scared to do anything. i hate that about myself so much. i just want companionship. i want that cuddle-on-the-couch-because-it's-raining-outside. i want the holding hands thing, i want the kissing and the hugging.

and of course, this story will end with another, "i don't think of you like this, maybe we can be friends."



i just don't understand what i'm doing wrong.